How often do we hear a cliché phrase and roll our eyes, thinking "yeah yeah, I know"?
A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with two of my best friends from high school where we briefly reminisced about "the good ol' days". We chuckled at how simple life truly was at the time, despite how complicated we made it seem in our teenage minds. I told them that when I have kids, I'm going to make sure they know to "enjoy every age and every stage of life" and not to wish they were anywhere else but where they are now...The words “enjoy the journey” and “be here now” flashed in my mind and before I could even roll my eyes…
It hit me.
Although this is a concept I teach my clients - so, intellectually, I know this VERY well - I realized that there are still a few areas of my life where I tend to focus mainly on the next achievement and goal, and forget to appreciate where I’m at in the present moment. 😳Perhaps clichés are cliché for a reason.
In our early teens, we couldn't wait to be older because "then we can drive, make our own rules, won't have homework, etc" and even in our late 20s, we find ourselves wishing we were younger, because "if I knew then what I know now, I'd be so much more *fill in the blank* (successful, wise, healthy, willing to accept help, happy, etc)". At every stage of life, we tend to look ahead or look back and wish we were elsewhere. 14-year-olds wish they were 16 so they could drive, 70-year-olds wish they were "young" again, 24-year-olds wish they were established in their careers, 47-year-olds wish they could retire or go back to a previous stage, and the wishin' and hopin' and thinkin' and prayin' continues. Why do we look back and ahead, with awe and fondness, and forget to look at where we are right now with the same lens of admiration?
We love setting and achieving goals, but it's never the goal that makes us feel proud, it's who we have to become (in order to achieve the goal) that we're truly proud of. We love recounting old memories, but it's never the memory that makes us feel happy, it's the meaning and emotions we've associated with the memory that makes us feel happy. Appreciating and experiencing the present allows us to experience more freedom in our thoughts, emotions, and actions. We aren't restricted by the past nor deterred by the uncertainty of the future, we can just be.
"Enjoy the journey", "Be here now", "Be present", "Love the process", etc... Perhaps clichés are cliché for a reason.
By the end of our conversation, we made a pact to enjoy each (st)age of our lives and to remind each other of that when needed.
Reflection Question: What area of my life do I tend to wish was in a different stage than where I'm currently at? Does that cause me any stress? If so, how might my emotions, thoughts, and actions be different when I begin to appreciate where I'm currently at in my journey?