Recognizing our emotions, thoughts, and patterns of behavior is an important tool to optimize mental and emotional wellbeing. Many people find that identifying an emotion in the moment can be helpful to allow the mind and body to either move through that state or to savor it. It can also enhance self-awareness, leading to better mind management and improved wellbeing.
In today's social media-led self-help movement, reciting "positive affirmations" has become a popular practice (my thoughts on that at a later time). One of the main beliefs of this practice is that if you repeatedly declare something about yourself, that declaration will soon come true. (Science behind that to also come at a later time)
Another practice that has become increasingly popular is identifying ourselves with our feelings and emotions. "I'm an anxious person" is a phrase I often hear from clients and peers alike. When did we decide that how we feel is who we are? When we start to believe that we are our emotions, it becomes a slippery slope, dampening: our own humanity, range of emotions, and ability to control them.
If your best friend was under a lot of stress one day and she acted in a way that was considered "unkind" but later apologized, would you label her an "unkind" person? What if she had repeated thoughts that she's "worthless" and subsequently felt that she was worthless? Would you agree with her and affirm that she is "worthless"?
Why then, do we identify with our feelings, actions, and thoughts? Are they really who we are? Or are they fleeting states that come and go from moment to moment, hour to hour, and day to day? If they're fleeting: identify them as such, don't identify as them.
When we repeatedly declare, think, or say something about ourselves, they become ‘affirmations’ of what we will (or already do) experience. If: angry, anxious, worthless, unkind, ugly, incompetent, etc are emotions that you feel or thoughts that you think but, are not who you are or who you want to be: identify them, don't identify with them.
Question for reflection: Which emotions or feelings do I commonly identify myself with? Who and what am I really?